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2015考研英语作文预测:道德滑坡
作文题目:
Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should
1) describe the drawing briefly,
2) interpret its social meaning
3) and give your comments.
You should write about 200 words neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
写作原文:
Looking at this thought-provoking picture symbolically depicted by the drawer, I do realize the urgency to improve the moral standards nowadays. A pregnant woman, an old man and his little granddaughter stands on the crowded bus, looking at a young man who sits in the seat comfortably with a piece of black cloth covering his eyes, puzzled and indignant.
The temporary blind in the picture indicates a serious phenomenon in the modern society that some young people are suffering from moral decline. The reasons contributing to moral decline are worth pondering. First, respecting the old and caring the young is abandoned by some modern people, because they only care about their own benefits. Only if you could provide them with a great outcome, will they lend you a hand in exchange. In addition, the educational system is also to blame . It emphasizes more on high marks at the expense of having few time to teach traditional moral values in school which leads to people's defect on this issue.
It is high time that we fostered our moral values. For one thing, schools and governments should play an active role n advocating moral values and traditional virtues to teach the young. For another, individuals should learn more about virtues and help people around with a warm heart.Only through our joint effort, could we recollect the virtues.
修改:
①Looking at this thought-provoking picture(加"which was",其中which引导定语从句,修饰picture;was和后面的depicted构成被动语态) symbolically depicted by the drawer, I do realize the urgency to improve the moral standards nowadays. ②A pregnant woman, an old man and his little granddaughter stands (“stands”改为“stand”,该句主语为复数,主谓应保持一致) on the crowded bus, looking at a young man who sits in the seat comfortably with a piece of black cloth covering his eyes, puzzled and indignant (“puzzled and indignant”是用来修饰the yong man, 或是作者“感到困惑和愤怒”,应表达清晰;若要表达作者的情感,可改为:...covering his eyes. I feel puzzled and indignant).
①The temporary blind in the picture indicates a serious phenomenon in the modern society that some young people are suffering from moral decline. ②The reasons contributing to moral decline are worth pondering. ③First, respecting the old and caring the young is abandoned by some modern people, because they only care about their own benefits. ④Only if you could provide them with a great outcome (“a great outcome”改为“great outcomes”,和them保持一致), will they lend you a hand (“a hand”改为“hands”,和they保持一致) in exchange. ⑤In addition, the educational system is also to blame ("be to blame for"意为“对……应负责任;应该为某事负责任”,如果要表述“教育体制也应对此负责”,可表达为:the educational system is also to blame for the phenomenon;如若要表述“教育体制也应受到责备”,可表达为the educational system should also to be blamed) . ⑥It emphasizes more on high marks at the expense of having few time to teach traditional moral values in school which leads to people's defect ("defect"为可数名词,此处应改为"defects"和people保持一致)on this issue.
①It is high time that we fostered our moral values. ②For one thing, schools and governments should play an active role ("an active role"应改为"active roles",前后主谓保持一致,主语为schools and governments)in advocating moral values and traditional virtues to teach the young. ③For another, individuals should learn more about virtues and help people around with a warm heart ("a warm heart"改为"warm hearts",前后单复数保持一致) . ④Only through our joint effort("effort"应改为"efforts",前后单复数保持一致), could we recollect the virtues.
原作点评:
第一段描述图画的内容。第①句,picture应该是被drawer描绘的,所以应该用被动语态“be+动词的过去的、分词”来表示;第②句最后,表达不够清晰,应注意。第二段揭示图画的寓意,阐述产生此现象的几个原因。应注意单复数问题。第三段结合前两段的阐述,提出建议。
总体点评:
文章亮点:文章结构完整,每个段落的功能基本得以体现。文章错误:①语法错误:文章出现了一些语法错误,比如被动语态、名词单复数形式等。②句法错误:有的句子表达不够清楚。比如第一段第②句,第二段第⑤句。修改意见:文章整体结构不错,但是要注意一些细节,避免不必要的错误。本文中,单复数一致问题较多,希望作者在完成习作时应多检查,尽量减少此类错误。
与道德相关的英语句子:
The public morals are declining and the revival of them requires sincere commitment to these good deeds.
No thinking man would refuse to admit the fact that it is the public morals and individuals’ good deeds ,such as helping the elderly cross the road that boost the sound evolution of a society.
And the flourishing and prevailing trend of traditional and modern virtues is indispensable for the harmonious society construction.
But the problems mentioned above perfectly exemplifies that many of us have not realize the essence of doing good deeds and it would bring some damaging consequences to harm the restoration of public morality.
提出解决的办法:
Were the situation to continue as it is, we would pay the high price.
It is high time that we enhanced the real sense of the importance of public morals. Specifically speaking, more campaigns should be initiated to promote people’s awareness. I have abundant confidence that with our real recognition and shared efforts we will create a more beautiful homeland.
可能用到的核心词汇:
phenomenon 现象
issue 争议,焦点
enlightening 富有启发的
cause alarm and attention 引起了警惕和重视
corrupt people’s mind 腐化心灵
immoral behaviors 不道德的行为
at the cost of 以…为代价
human relations 人际关系
set good example for 为…树立榜样
dedicate 做贡献
take action 采取行动,
ensure implementing activities 确保执行,
impose punishment on them 施加处罚,
aggravate the seriousness of…使之恶化,
commit crime 犯罪,
vulnerable 易诱惑的,易受影响的,
criteria of evaluation 衡量标准,
be supposed to 应该
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