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1. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change.
如果你用一分钱买他的想法，你还能拿到找零的。
2. She got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn’t watching.
她肯定是趁救生员不备，跳进过基因池。
3. During evolution, his ancestors were in the control group.
如果进化时他的祖先不是在控制组的话，他也许不会这么蠢。
4. A room temperature IQ.
智商简直和室温一样高。
5. He has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
他有两个大脑，一个丢了，另一个去找去了。
6. She found some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but she just gargled.
人家畅饮智慧之泉，她却只是拿来漱了漱口。
7. It takes him an-hour-and-a-half to watch 60 minutes.
他要花一个半小时来观察一个小时。
8. She sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
她给自己设定的标准实在太低了，但每次还是达不到。
9. If he were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week.
如果他再笨点儿，就要一周给他浇两次水了。(把他当植物来看了。)
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